Sunday, August 21, 2016

Millville Honey Puffs Cereal (Aldi)

Hope you like your cereal soggy and flavorless!
Here we have a honeycomb-shaped cereal that's available as a Special Buy from Aldi stores. I had bad memories of this cereal the last time I got it, but decided to try it again for two reasons: 1.) I didn't review it the first time, and 2.) I was hoping either my memories were misplaced, or the recipe had changed. It did not, and Millville's Honey Puffs still remain one of the worst, if not thee worst, cereal that I've ever had from the German discount chain.

Before I go on a tirade detailing everything that's wrong with it, let's start with the positives: right out of the box, it looks very similar to the national brand, which I used to enjoy as a child. I popped a couple in my mouth without milk, and it's a really solid knockoff, with a light touch of honey-infused sweetness that goes perfectly with the light, puffed cereal. Everything is off to a perfect start so far.

Unfortunately, milk is almost a necessity with cereal, and it's the addition of this liquid substance that starts the immediate downward spiral. You might get a couple of decent bites in before the milk completely ruins it; if you're not as into milk as I am, and just use a bit to get the bottom of the bowl wet (I fill my bowl up at least halfway with the stuff), then you might be good for a few more. But, inevitably, as the cereal gets coated with the liquid, it will immediately start to get soggy. This is where the fatal problems occur.

Honey Puffs don't just get soggy when they get soggy: they also get grainy. So we go from having these smooth, light puffs of well-textured cereal, to soft, grainy bits of cereal that fall apart in your mouth. It's actually a rather gross feeling, that's compounded by the second little problem: the milk completely washes away all the taste. So not are you only getting grainy globs of rapidly-dissolving cereal, but you're getting completely tasteless globs of rapidly-dissolving cereal.

By the time I get to the bottom of the bowl, the milk is the only thing that has any taste to it. I remembered this being a problem the last time I bought these (over a year ago), but thought maybe I was exaggerating how bad it was in my head. I was not. This is a shame, because out of the box it has the look and the taste of the national brand, but by the end, it's nothing more than a tasteless glob of inedible mush.

Overall: 2/10. If you or your child enjoy eating cereal straight out of the box (I remember my mom giving me Cheerios as a snack during church when I was a wee one), then this is well worth the purchase price. If, however, you like to add milk to your cereal, then don't even bother picking this up. It looks and tastes like the national brand, but once milk is added, it not only gets soggy, but completely grainy. Even worse: all of the flavor washes away the longer it sits in the liquid, so by the time you reach the end of the bowl, you're left with tasteless bits of complete nothingness. You might be able to prolong the inevitable by either adding only a teeny bit of milk, and/or eating it insanely fast, but why should you have to alter your eating habits just to avoid being disappointed by a cereal product? This is the only Aldi cereal I can recall that wouldn't be worth it at any price.

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